Five Ways to Achieve More in Life
You like to have high standards, great expectations for yourself and others and that feeling of ticking off your To-Do list feels really good. You like to achieve at work, provide for your family, be the best possible parent and friend, stay in incredible shape and find time for personal growth and giving back to community. People often describe you as “overachiever” and it makes you proud.
But you’ve realized that the more you take on, the more you struggle with handling stress. You’ve relied on to-do lists to stay on top of the many items that fill your calendar, but this system is not working for you. A to-do list won’t help you become in charge of your own life — it will simply make you feel like you’re not doing enough. You’re ultimately sabotaging yourself. To truly grow, you have to learn life management skills instead of just piling more tasks on your plate.
If you find yourself achieving things, checking them off your to- do list and still wondering, “Is this all there is?” then it’s time to change your approach by integrating these mindful techniques into your life.
1. FIND PURPOSE
What do you want from your life? What is your ultimate outcome? And why do you want it? What will it give you at the end? The answer isn’t buying a nice car or expensive house. Your true goal is something deeper, meaningful and something that will provide a long-lasting fulfillment. What is it, when you think about it, brings you a sense of joy, fun and freedom? What does it mean to you to live an extraordinary life? That’s what you’re working for. It could be providing for your family or being the best in your field, but it isn’t about material things.
All too often you lose sight of your end goal when thinking about what you want to achieve. This results in creating meaningless to-do lists instead of tapping into life management resources. You get swept up in the short-term tasks you’ve listed instead of pursuing your higher purpose. The more clarity you have regarding your goals, the more likely you are to achieve them. Once you know what you really want, you start making progress to achieve it.
2. LEARN TO COMPARTMENTALIZE
You’re not failing at reaching your goals because you’re incapable of success — you’re failing because you’re trying to focus on too many things at once. Changing the way you think about your goals is one of the life management skills that will help you focus. Don’t think about the things that you need to do to achieve your goal — think about and visualise your outcome. You need to learn to focus your attention. Where focus goes, energy flows, and when you focus on the key results that are most important in your life, you can maximize your desired outcomes as well as your sense of fulfillment and joy. The reasoning behind this is that when you have a clear sense of purpose driving your actions, you’ll be more driven to do whatever it takes to succeed.
You see, a major source of stress in our lives comes from the feeling that we have an impossible number of things to do and no time to do them. It’s difficult to manage stress when we feel there are far too many tasks to get done in the course of a day. When we start feeling overwhelmed by what we need to get done, we do things like create to-do lists to feel more organized, but then become frustrated by the sheer number of things on the list before we even start tackling tasks. This often leads to the attempt to multitask, which fractures our attention even more.
We’ll often take an objective and pull it apart into a million pieces or tie it all together into one abstract whole. For example, if you take on a project and try to do the whole thing all at once, you’re going to be overwhelmed. And similarly, if you take a task and break it into too many small steps, it’s equally overwhelming, daunting and frustrating. So, what’s the solution?
No matter how skilled you are at handling multiple details, most people can only focus on a limited number of things at one time. When most people are learning, they tend to remember things that are grouped into threes. And anything above three things becomes too much for us to remember. In other words, most people tend to get overwhelmed after three different pieces of information.
To begin the process, you must get the ideas out of your head and onto paper (or into your computer or mobile device – anywhere where you can record your thoughts). We call this process capturing.
Keeping everything locked up in your mind is just another way to add stress to your life. You need to adopt a routine or habit of always documenting the things you want or need to accomplish. Remember, human beings are able to focus on a limited number of things or tasks at once and choosing your focus is a necessity if you want to accomplish anything. Usually, anywhere from five to nine items can be handled at a time before we lose focus.
Document the ideas, meetings and communications you need to handle and the required results for each section. Capture the things that are a must for you to accomplish, whether they are the things you really want – like getting a promotion at work – or situations that demand your attention, like doing laundry or picking up your kids from netball practice. Write down everything you have to do this week.
Now that you’ve captured the things that are a must for you to accomplish within a week, the next step in the method is to begin looking for commonalities. What items relate to finances, relationships or your career, etc.?
Organise those items on your capture list that correspond to the most common areas of life mastery: health, meaning and emotions, relationships, time, work/career/mission, finances and even spirituality.
Example:
3. UTILIZE TIME IN A SMART WAY
One of the important steps to achieving any goal is to continue learning at every opportunity. However, it can be difficult to access the books, podcasts and videos that will further your knowledge when you feel like there’s no time left in the day. Feeding your mind during downtime is a life management skill that will take your expertise to a new level.
This is where time management skills come in and they are based on the concept that you always have time during your day that you can fill with learning. This could mean listening to a podcast during your morning commute or an audiobook while you’re shopping for groceries or reading a book while you wait for an appointment.
4. SPEND TIME ON RELATIONSHIPS
Life management skills are not all about achieving optimal physical health and getting ahead at work. You should also make sure to take time every day to cultivate relationships with those you love. Planning for date nights and opportunities for deeper connection is crucial to creating a healthy relationship with your partner. Reserving time to play with, read to and talk to your kids about their day is vital to developing bonds with your children. Don’t view the time you take to relax and connect as wasted time. Instead, see it as an important life management component that adds to your overall well-being.
5. LEARN HOW TO COMMUNICATE BETTER
How often do you lose valuable time at work or at home because of a miscommunication? Maybe a project needs to be redone because the objectives weren’t clearly communicated, or you and your partner took the afternoon off work to handle a plumbing issue at home because you didn’t effectively communicate who would take care of it. Communicating with your partner and your team at the office leads to better relationships and streamlined schedules. Learn the communication styles of those you frequently interact with and understand that life management becomes easier when you slow down and take the time to truly listen.
As you move forward on your journey, know that there will be challenging times. When faced with a setback, or if you feel that you’ve failed completely, don’t give up. Move forward and ask yourself, what will it cost me if I don’t accomplish this goal? Am I missing out on an incredible career opportunity, will I disappoint my children or miss out on living the life that I want?
Learning to set and achieve goals is a great habit that few truly master in their lifetimes. Get everything you want this year, and every year, by deciding to set and achieve goals that truly matter to you. I know you can do it! ☺